Finding my loves again

One of the reasons I wanted to start this blog was to explore and learn more about the things I love. Up till now I have opted to please others more than myself but last year I began realising that I am of no use to anyone if I don’t exist.

It’s easy to stop existing if you try hard enough and I found myself not knowing whether I wanted coffee or tea, toast or cereal. Simple choices seemed so hard and I would rather do whatever everyone else was doing. I rarely felt joy over my own choices. When I was on my own, I felt empty.

I have been working to grow beyond that place and find within myself what I really want.

I’ve thought a lot about what makes me smile. I remember times when all I would do is write poetry. I remember taking photographs of absolutely everything. I have had moments where nothing brought me more happiness than watching the sun rise or studying the patterns of a leaf.

I used to love exploring the garden, taking photos along the way.
I used to love exploring the garden, taking photos along the way.

I sat down the other day and wrote a page of things that I love to do or experience. I’m looking forward to going through that list and drawing inspiration and joy from each of those things.

Who knows, I might even find new things to love.

So here’s to finding more joy and exploring my loves.

– Heidi x

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